tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3762384624354104595.post2459386568911961887..comments2023-09-12T12:07:20.980-04:00Comments on cheryl chamblee: what s/he wrotecheryl chambleehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15954708196592482951noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3762384624354104595.post-3465053487194900772012-07-21T18:14:12.453-04:002012-07-21T18:14:12.453-04:00we've been experimenting with how long to let ...we've been experimenting with how long to let our baby be frustrated before we help her, too. it's hard, and sometimes we get it wrong, but i think it's good for all of us.<br /><br />AND...such a good thing to bring up: talking about values in opposition to others' demonstrated values. yes. that's often how it comes up for us when we haven't talked about it in a while on our own, and i don't like the way that feels either. thanks for the comment, lady!cheryl chambleehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15954708196592482951noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3762384624354104595.post-35076206508976086762012-07-21T18:10:13.128-04:002012-07-21T18:10:13.128-04:00amy, i love this example. i remember in elementar...amy, i love this example. i remember in elementary school, my friend and i used to say to her mom, "we're bored! what can we do?" and she'd say, "mildew. three times in a row." it didn't make any sense at all, but even though we left in a huff, we figured out something to do on our own.cheryl chambleehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15954708196592482951noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3762384624354104595.post-46078714603568928332012-07-21T18:07:44.860-04:002012-07-21T18:07:44.860-04:00yes! the devices are overrunning me, especially n...yes! the devices are overrunning me, especially now that i have the dang smartphone. it's much harder to have the cross-legged conversations, the kind i used to have when i was in college and had all the time in the world (though i didn't recognize it then). i think we still need those cross-legged, values-exploring conversations as adults, mamas, papas, workers,...cheryl chambleehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15954708196592482951noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3762384624354104595.post-90129273552664252152012-07-16T13:52:27.025-04:002012-07-16T13:52:27.025-04:00i read that article in the New Yorker too, and wha...i read that article in the New Yorker too, and what stood out to me was the talk about it's ok to get the kids frustrated. The whole French mom thing. While I didn't agree that I would let my kid scream for 5 minutes on principle before i went to pick her up, i did like the idea that it's not only ok for your child to be frustrated and work through frustration sometimes, but that it's really, really good for her. At every age. I have tried to be a little less susceptible to answering her every beck and call just because it's easier...and to keep taking the time to do the laundry with her and give her chores to do (like feeding the dog). It definitely takes longer to do such things with a 2 year old, but it's worth it. oh, i'm rambling.....also wanted to say that I like the values idea very much. We never sit down and talk about those except in opposition to others' demonstrated values -- as in, "we would never do what X&Y do", which I think is a mistake. The last serious conversation we had about a life plan/values was pre-wedding, while writing vows. Hmm. Thanks for the post!!Jessicahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00991638626164427455noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3762384624354104595.post-37306788863895466872012-07-16T11:35:45.164-04:002012-07-16T11:35:45.164-04:00Preach it, sister. One thing I've noticed with...Preach it, sister. One thing I've noticed with my Brownie troop is that they all want to be entertained all the time, but if you take away all planned activity, they find much more creative things to do. Kids in an empty room will put on a play, or chase each other around, or invent games--which is surely more valuable than me providing "something to do." There are so few ways that adults can stretch their imaginations with no prompting. We should let kids do it while they can...and maybe they won't lose the ability later.Amy Shttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16430178347945864598noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3762384624354104595.post-86188705168863768422012-07-15T21:29:19.629-04:002012-07-15T21:29:19.629-04:00absolutely agree. Auto pilot - that is a life live...absolutely agree. Auto pilot - that is a life lived without it being driven and steered by your articulated values. I think turning off the devices and sitting cross-legged and talking is the best way to uncover those values and check ourselves on whether we are living by them. I read something recently about how we are all so busy and yet it is mostly self imposed and because we don't have our priorities straight. We are supposedly too busy to have quality time and conversations, and yet we spend hours and hours a day in front of email, facebook and TV for example. I still have some letting go of email and FB to do. Not having TV is amazing.... there is SO much time for other more important things when there is no TV. And now... i am shutting this computer down to go read a book. I will say, however, that 15 mins reading your posts are well spent. :)mwhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07894983169381710079noreply@blogger.com